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What is Ego

What is Ego? How do you define it? Really, what is it? I have heard about
‘Ego’ so many times. Most recently when having a debate about color
and it being an energy/vibration. That then veered off into someone
saying that the questions I used would not be used by their highly
intelligent clients.

Well, that pushed my buttons and I went into defensive mode stating
that I could quite easily bring in my clients and their value, but don’t
we all have value? Aren’t we all an expert in something? What if you
make the best cupcakes? Does that make you inferior to a brain surgeon?
(Were you not taught as a child that a brain surgeon was the most clever
person?) What if I LOVE cupcakes and I don’t fancy having brain surgery
today?

Anyway, back to my story. After this whole debate on a Facebook
group, as this is where it took place, people started commenting and
saying that it was all ‘a battle of Egos’. What exactly does that mean?

To be honest when people say the word Ego I have an image
of a man that is normally invisible that comes out into the open.
He is mostly hidden somewhere in a persons body and he is really
rascally because one can neither see him or grab hold of him.
Where is he when he isn’t out battling and fighting? Is he
somewhere deep inside eating cupcakes and drinking tea
waiting to pop out and defend your honor?

I spent many years training with the Native American Indians.
They don’t talk about Ego, that subject never came up. Not
in the 10 years of training. The only thing that I trained in
and learned in that is close to Ego is the concept of functioning
(or working) from your 3rd Chakra. Your 3rd Chakra (Solar Plexus)
is an area where you hold onto the beliefs, stories, lies, limitations,
pictures and programs about YOU and how the world relates to
you and because of you.

The Native American’s would tell me to keep my 3rd Chakra in
check. To close it down more. To not work from or come from
that place. Because everything I did when coming from that place
was being filtered through all the limitations of my negative self
image. My need to be powerful, but
really coming from a place of weakness.

So, during that debate when the intelligence of my clients and
my work was brought up where did I go? I went straight to my
3rd Chakra and started to play and respond from there. That I
understand. But how is that Ego?

Again, what is EGO? Before training with the Native American’s
I would get so frustrated by that invisible man that came out to
play that was completely an enigma and I had no way of grasping
hold of him or stopping him. The language I’ve heard with Ego is
that it’s not really YOU, not the normal you, it’s this undefinable thing
that has taken over you, or is acting on your behalf or getting you to
where you are going. Julian told me that he read a book where the Ego
was good. The Ego was always getting you to your true spiritual self,
even if it was in a round about not direct route. So the Ego wasn’t that
bad after all.

But if Ego is good, then why do people act likes its the worse thing?
Another image it brings to mind is that you are going out to lunch
with your good friends to someplace quite nice and you have a bag
with you and sometime during lunch you open the bag and let your
little monster out. Naughty you! Why did you bring your monster to
lunch? Who is that little monster? What is it?

What if Ego really is just YOU functioning from your own self
imposed limitations? What if it’s not wrong? Are you willing to
just be you? Are you willing to be the little monster?

I say that what I did was all me. I didn’t have something unknown,
unseen and uncontrollable dictating my actions for the good or bad.
It was ME. Maybe I am a little monster. I’m OK with that! But I will be
keeping my 3rd Chakra in check. AND if any cupcakes are to be
eaten they will be eaten by me!

Big Hugs,
Angela

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Comments

20 Responses to “What is Ego”

  1. patty sherry says:

    Hi Angela,

    I really enjoyed your blog and prompt for a response about what Ego is to me. I too have heard many talk and debate about the Ego, what it is, etc..

    My conclusions about it are not so much IF the Ego exists or what exactly it is but more so my feelings about it. This is what I find most interesting. I don’t feel it is something I need to judge as a side to me that is bad or less then a side of myself one might to refer to as “higher self”, soul, etc. I am at peace that it simply is, and recognize when I feel triggered from this place.

    For the purpose of this discussion I don’t FEAR my Ego, think it is wrong, bad, or view it as something I need to ‘control” but something I choose to accept and embrace as a part of me.

    I believe I am a polarity, and there is a side of me who feels less or not enough and a side to me who feels complete. For me having an awareness of my own triggers, accepting them, and choosing something new from that place has been helpful.

  2. Lizzie Soteriou says:

    Interesting Angela, thanks for this. I have been thinking of a similarish thing lately, i heard somewhere that ‘man strives to be superior’ I wondered if this links in with ego. I dont like the idea of holding people to be less superior, and i dont like to be held to be less superior. so i like to think of us all as balanced, and equals, sure we all have lots to both teach and learn, if we dont even know it, but beneath it all were all still something very similar, unique and special.
    I guess i used to think once that ego was that self rightious superiority, is it confidence? I was always told to be more confident, I think i’ve gained a slice, maybe, it comes and goes, onething i have gained is the knowledge I’m ok, and perfectly just perfect!!
    So is ego good? believing in yourself, having faith. Yes love it all.

  3. Evelyn says:

    Amazing Angela,

    I love the questions and I love the thought of inviting my “little monster” out to play more. I think its natural, as in a human nature reflex to shoot from the 3rd chakra when we feel threatened. I don’t see Ego as a bad thing, really. My view of Ego is that it’s tied to our base, natural, physically human characteristics. It’s main goal is self preservation, so it often works at cross-purposes to our Higher Self, when our goal is to reach for enlightenment. Since we know that whatever you resist persists, it is useless to battle against it. When I’m present enough to notice that my EGO has gotten the upper hand, I giggle and take a lesson about reacting without pausing to think first.

    I’m so glad to see you blogging again. ;-)

    Peace,

    Evelyn ;-)

  4. Jane Manthorpe says:

    Hi Angela
    Ego to me, is the side of you that protects you from any harm. Ego wants the norm, safe environment where nothing goes away from the normal path of life. It likes you to be in your comfort zone and does not like to be expanded or forced to grow into something more than the average.

    So when you decide that you want to go out of your comfort zone or expand or grow as an individual that involves risks or big decisions of either money spending, moving ship or changing any direction which is major, it will go out of its way to prevent from this happening and do anything to sabotage your efforts to do so.

    For an example, the ego will fill your brain with negative thoughts, worries and disbeliefs about you being good enough, don;t have the money or money is not for spending on such risky adventures or money is scarce so save it for a rainy day. etc It would also cause you do things you end up regretting, like over eating to comfort yourself, overdose on things or spend too much money on things you don;t need, the aim of the ego is to stop you from doing anything that takes you away from just normal and remain that way.

    Thats my take on the ego, its there for a reason to protect us from harm, like if we did not have ego we would hurt ourselves by burning ourselves or walking in front of a car etc its there to warn us and keep us safe. But it is also a pain if you want to become more than the average person and be ultra successful :)

    To friend the ego so it supports your, sometimes it just needs quieting down but do this as though its your friend, introduce it to a job to do, to protect you from harm as your guardian but allow you to test, risk and go out of the norm to follow your dreams. In other words you have to talk to your ego and make it your friend and give it job to do that supports your desired goal of success.

  5. Rita says:

    Hi, Angela,
    for me, ego only seems to be a problem when I resist, react, align or agree with something and then I have a vested interest in being right or good or whatever I think I’m not. Otherwise, from a spiritual point of view, you cannot think anything too good about yourself – a healthy ego is essential to ease, joy and glory. And everything else is just an interesting point of view, particularly other people’s POV”s. And if every molecule in the universe supports me, what’s right about what I perceive as an attack on my ego? What gift and contribution is this to my life? What qualities, talents and abilites is this asking me to embody? Am I willing to lose control and have more ease? Am I willing to be judged by others? What POV”s do I have about them or what they’re saying that makes it significant? POC & POD all that “cause what anybody else thinks about me is none of my business. Who does that belong to, anyway? Can you tell this issue is kind of fresh for me? LOL!
    Thank you for sharing, Angela. And thank you for your free teleclass recently, I very much enjoyed it!

  6. Maria says:

    Dear Angela,

    Thank you for your awareness to this, this is such a good question!
    For me, there are two aspects of the concept of Ego.

    At first, EGO stands for “EDGING GOD ( or Creator, Allness, Oneness, Universe, Spirit, All Space- anywhere this word resonates with you ) OUT…
    And what that means in my point of view is that every time we dis-connect ourselves from our Infinite Being-ness, every time we play small and little, every time we get stuck on “me” and “my story”, we lose the big picture of our true identity, we function from an Ego point of view.
    I don’t believe Ego is “someone” that I need to battle with, something like a real monster, because I believe that the more power I give to it in my thought as such, the more becomes “something”. In Truth, we are all so much bigger and powerful than any suggestion that tries to separate us from our true identity.
    That’s why your native American teachers didn’t bring your attention to it. Why bringing your attention on something that doesn’t mean anything to the powerful infinite YOU?

    In the buffet of life we have lots of choices, and we can easily presented a platter of Ego( a human story we buy for ourselves that is full of fat judgement), but as with every tempting food that we may or may not choose to eat, we can say “no thanks!”

    Second, Ego is the translation of the Greek word “I”.
    Every time I meditate in the word “I”, I am in awe! To me it includes everything and anything, all that is, all that exists.
    “I” stands for the allness of me and everything-ness of me, the BEING-NESS that chooses the uniqueness of me, the “I” that be: The good, the bad and the ugly!
    What if I contain all and everything without any judgement and I am just EGO?
    Oh, that sounds so wonderful to me!

    Cheers,
    Maria

  7. Wendy Ingram says:

    Hi Angela,

    Love the question about ego. My perspective is that the ego is the same as your Native American 3rd Chakra, it is the lower harmonic of you defending or portraying your judgements and limiting beliefs, instead of shining your true self and knowing. When you look at someone with a “Pompous” ego, underneath you are really seeing their limiting beliefs of self, they are not good enough, therefore over compensate and become eogtisical.

    These paradigm’s can be generational and therefore people do not see them for what they really are, but some do use them to the advantage. I like Gary and Dain’s concept of “interesting point of view” and would the ego really exist anymore if we could all live in this state and our knowing?

    Cheers
    Wendy

  8. Sigridur/Siddy says:

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts Angela :)
    My take on it is that the word EGO has become a negative word, just like fat… What we make of other peoples assumptions about the definitions of Ego is up to us. Pushing against is never a good strategy to get rid of anything either. So what, if we don’t all agree, and have different views of the world?
    Work with what we have (and not against it) and mold ourselves as best we can to become and be who we are.
    And by the way, the word in and of it self was first used by Freud, and not at all in a negative sense :) http://psychology.about.com/od/eindex/g/def_ego.htm

  9. angela says:

    Thank you all so much for your amazing thought provoking comments! How did we all get to be so lucky? What else is possible?

  10. Wow you are all awesome and what great contribution to Angela’s amazing willingness to look at EGO! Gary Douglas from Access ConsciousnessTM once said in class ‘Would an infinite being have an EGO?’ I looked at that and muld it around. How much in this reality has EGO been made a wrongness? Something we have to battle to overcome? Suppress? How much has that caused separation from our very being? What if it is our friend? A great contribution to our being, our living? It is me and I am it! We are all one!

  11. angela says:

    Thank you so much for this! I haven’t heard Gary talk about Ego, so it’s great to get his point of view!
    Big Hugs, Angela

  12. angela says:

    I didn’t realize that Ego was from the Greek word “I”. How amazing. I always forget
    that people take Greek words and often change the pronunciation! “I” in Greek is
    pronounced more like “eggo”. Saying it and perceiving the energy of it reminds me
    of my Buddhist chanting. There is a passage, my favorite passage from the Lotus
    Sutra in Sanskrit that is: Ji ga tokka burrai. Which means “I am the great Buddha”.

  13. Elouise says:

    The best one liner to describe Ego was by Paramhansa Yogananda, it said “the Ego is the Soul identified with the body”. What does that mean in our day to day life?

    For me, it means the Ego can be both friend and foe. When I believe I am this body, this life is the only reality that feels like Ego, I feel a restriction because I’m experiencing subtle frustration about how to solve challenges I’m experiencing from the outside as I believe that’s everything.

    When I believe I am the Soul and I function day to day from there I feel expansive and light inside.

    Like your example of being with friends at lunch, we are talking on a subject and I say something that I realise brings me a tense feeling. I feel that comment is from my Ego I was trying to get a point across and I was manipulating (however subtle) trying to influence friends to my way of thinking and the energy I was putting out was ‘I am right and it’s this way’.

    Ego is also personality and can be friend, we need a personality to be who we are. This idea of dissolving the Ego is impossible. It’s part of us, part of who we are. In Yogic tradition the Ego is said to be situated at the back of the head, by the Medula Oblongata.

    I can tell when the Ego wants to be in control by the thoughts I’m having. Fro example, I know meditation is good for me and brings me peace. If my egoic thoughts are chattering away and wanting to be in charge I would not meditate. So I sit down and tell them, don’t worry, you still run the show. For now we are going to meditate so just chill out for the time being. It works for me.

    When we feel offended, the ego is the one being offended. “I should not be spoken to in such a way, did you see how he treated me, I’m better than that” and so on. I, my, me mine is the mantra for the ego. We know deep down we are all connected and if someone is hurting others, they are hurt themselves. I guess what I’m saying is, the ego is part of ourselves and through working with it instead of making is the bad man we can enjoy all aspects of ourselves.

    What I hope for is that the ego in me is less and less obvious, more interesting when I notice the thoughts of the ego as opposed to jarring me and what I want is to enjoy it even. To enjoy that part of my personality that is ego and check it on where the feeling is coming from when I’m talking or writing or coaching etc. I ask myself, does it feel clean or what was I trying to do there by hiding what I really wanted to share. What was my agenda and then question it to release it.

    To infinity and beyond :-)

    Love
    Elouise

  14. brenda says:

    really enjoying your blog angela.. i like what you said about the invisible man coming out..
    i think for me i need to accept my ego and just watch it like a movie… then know that i’m
    an infinite being..

  15. angela says:

    What if you there is nothing wrong with you?
    Would you be willing to run: What if there is nothing wrong with me?
    What is right about me that I am not getting?

  16. Maria says:

    What a great contribution, everybody! How does it get any better than that?

  17. Trish says:

    Hey Angela, since I am one of your clients AND I do consider myself intelligent AND I absolutely get value from everything you do with and for me – I’d say pish-posh (although you know me, I’d definitely say it stronger than that) to whoever told you otherwise.

    As for ego, I have one recommendation: Watch the movie ‘Revolver’ with Jason Statham. It is, by far, the most brilliant representation of the ego I have ever seen. Enjoy!

    Your lovely client, Trish (heheh!)

  18. angela says:

    Thank you, Beautiful Trish,
    How did I get to be so lucky?
    You are amazing!!
    Big Hugs,
    Angela

  19. Angela Love Howe says:

    Ego was something Freud invented lol xxxxx

  20. angela says:

    Thank you, Angela. But, is he a little man that eats cupcakes?

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